Let’s face it: you’ve been to our shows. Maybe you danced, maybe you cried, maybe you accidentally spilled your drink on someone who turned out to be your future ex. But through it all, one thing has always been missing from your concert experience, a name tag.
Now, not just any name tag. We’re talking about the official “Waiting For A Name” name tag. It’s not just merch. It’s a lifestyle. It’s a small rectangle of magic that says, “Hi, my name is probably something, but let’s not get hung up on that.”
Why Do You Need One?
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Lost? Confused? Emotionally unavailable? Slap on the name tag. Instant identity.
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Tired of answering “So what’s your name again?” at every show? Boom. Sticker.
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Want to instantly confuse and delight your fellow fans? Boom. Sticker.
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Got commitment issues with permanent tattoos? This is the safe and sticky alternative.
- Want to feel like a character in a Wes Anderson film, but louder and slightly sweatier? You guessed it. Sticker.
Real Fan Testimonials (Not Legally Binding)
- “I wore the sticker and instantly forgot all my passwords. It was freeing.” – Probably Jeff
- “Wore it into a bank. Got asked zero questions. I think they were afraid of me.” – Chauncey
- “My grandma saw it and said ‘You need milk.’” – Verified crowd member
- “I put it on my dog. My dog is now mayor of a small town in New Mexico.” – Definitely Not Lying
Bonus Features:
- Can be licked by toddlers and survive.
- Slightly more stylish than a QR code tattoo.
- Scientifically proven* to improve your chances of catching the bassist’s eye.
*study conducted by bassist. Sample size: 1.
Still Not Convinced?
We understand. Maybe you think name tags are for conferences, awkward mixers, or your Aunt Linda’s fourth wedding. But this isn’t just a tag. It’s a beacon. A badge. A silent cry into the void that says, “Yes, I have impeccable taste in local blues-fusion-rock-with-a-touch-of-hand-drumming bands.”
So grab yours now. Wear it proud. Because if we’re all waiting for a name, at least let yours be visible.
Available at the merch table, or wherever fine identification rectangles are sold.
-=WFAN=-